{"id":58366,"date":"2019-03-28t13:00:18","date_gmt":"2019-03-28t17:00:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/48e130086c.nxcli.net\/?p=58366"},"modified":"2019-05-02t15:07:15","modified_gmt":"2019-05-02t19:07:15","slug":"tax-season-funnies-how-golf-is-like-taxes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"\/\/www.g005e.com\/2019\/03\/28\/tax-season-funnies-how-golf-is-like-taxes\/","title":{"rendered":"tax season funnies: how golf is like taxes"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/cpatwpe.s3.amazonaws.com\/cpatrendlines\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/golfclubteehill_adobestock_98218666.jpeg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-53762\" src=\"https:\/\/cpatwpe.s3.amazonaws.com\/cpatrendlines\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/golfclubteehill_adobestock_98218666-424x281.jpeg\" alt=\"golf club by tee at tee box, looking downhill at hole\" width=\"424\" height=\"281\" \/><\/a>getting you through these last few weeks.<br \/>\n<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>as collected by <a href=\"\/\/www.g005e.com\/author\/mckenzie\/\">robert e. mckenzie<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>why are tax advisors so calm and composed? they have strong internal controls.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>a dime is a dollar with all the various taxes deducted.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<blockquote><p><b>more tax season humor:<\/b> <a href=\"\/\/www.g005e.com\/2019\/03\/13\/the-tax-season-funnies-aftermath-of-the-revolution\/\">tax season funnies: after the revolution<\/a> | <a href=\"\/\/www.g005e.com\/2019\/02\/26\/a-little-tax-humor-worst-video-game-ever\/\">the tax season funnies: worst video game ever<\/a> |<a href=\"\/\/www.g005e.com\/2017\/02\/16\/little-tax-humor\/\"> a little tax humor<\/a> |<a href=\"\/\/www.g005e.com\/2013\/02\/15\/how-many-irs-agents-does-it-take-to-screw-in-a-light-bulb\/\"> how many irs agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?<\/a><br \/>\n<strong><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-49700\" src=\"http:\/\/4f2bur4nuye2cgakm2rm61qk.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/08\/yellow_key_clip_art-e1375897299811-36p-hi-1-e1470686574894.jpg\" alt=\"goprocpa.com\" width=\"39\" height=\"16\" \/><span style=\"color: #b79c00;\">exclusively for pro members. <\/span><\/strong><span style=\"color: #b79c00;\"><a style=\"color: #b79c00;\" href=\"\/\/www.g005e.com\/wp-login.php?redirect_to=\/\/www.g005e.com\/2019\/03\/28\/tax-season-funnies-how-golf-is-like-taxes\/\">log in here<\/a> or <a class=\"external\" style=\"color: #b79c00;\" href=\"http:\/\/goprocpa.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">2022世界杯足球排名 today<\/a>.<\/span><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<ul>\n<li>the reward for saving money is being able to pay our taxes without borrowing.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>why not slap a tax on political gas?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>golf is a lot like taxes: you drive hard to get to the green and then wind up in the hole.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>the real problem with the tax system is that we all want to eliminate other people\u2019s loopholes without giving up any of our own tax incentives.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>an irs agent contacted a preacher to verify a parishioner\u2019s church contributions and asked, \u201cdid mr. smith give $6,000 to your church?\u201d the father said, \u201che will, son. he will.\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>a patient was at her doctor\u2019s office after undergoing a complete physical exam. the doctor said, \u201ci have some very grave news for you. you only have six months to live.\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 40px;\">the patient asked, \u201coh doctor, what should i do?\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 40px;\">the doctor replied, \u201cmarry an accountant.\u201d<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 40px;\">\u201cwill that make me live longer?\u201d asked the patient.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 40px;\">\u201cno,\u201d said the doctor, \u201cbut it will seem longer.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>a young man asked an old rich man how he made his money. the old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, \u201cwell, son, it was 1932. the depth of the great depression. i was down to my last nickel.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 40px;\">\u201ci invested that nickel in an apple. i spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, i sold the apple for 10 cents.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 40px;\">\u201cthe next morning, i invested those 10 cents in two apples. i spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 p.m. for 20 cents. i continued this system for a month, by the end of which i\u2019d accumulated a fortune of $1.37.<\/p>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 40px;\">\u201cthen my wife\u2019s father died and left us two million dollars.\u201d<\/p>\n<div class='shareinpost'><ul class=\"socialwrap row\"><li class=\"icon_text\"><a  rel='nofollow'  target='_blank'  title='https:\/\/www.facebook.com'  href='http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/sharer.php?u=https%3a%2f%2fwww.g005e.com%2f2019%2f03%2f28%2ftax-season-funnies-how-golf-is-like-taxes%2f&amp;t=tax+season+funnies%3a+how+golf+is+like+taxes'  ><img  src='\/\/www.g005e.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/share-and-follow\/images\/blank.gif'  height='24' width='24'  class='image-24' alt='facebook'  style='background: transparent url(\/\/www.g005e.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/share-and-follow\/default\/24\/sprite-feb-24.png) no-repeat;padding:0;margin:0;height:24px;width:24px;background-position:-300px 0px'   \/> <span class=\"head\">like this on facebook<\/span><\/a><\/li><li class=\"icon_text\"><a  rel='nofollow'  target='_blank'  title='https:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/'  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href=\"mailto:?subject=cpa%20trendlines%20:%20tax%20season%20funnies:%20how%20golf%20is%20like%20taxes&amp;body=here's%20something%20worth%20seeing%20from%20\/\/www.g005e.com...\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n%20%20\/\/www.g005e.com\/2019\/03\/28\/tax-season-funnies-how-golf-is-like-taxes\/\" title=\"email this: tax season funnies: how golf is like taxes \"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"\/\/www.g005e.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/share-and-follow\/images\/blank.gif\" height=\"24\"  width=\"24\" style=\"background: transparent url(\/\/www.g005e.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/share-and-follow\/default\/24\/sprite-feb-24.png) no-repeat;padding:0;margin:0;height:24px;width:24px;background-position:-275px 0px\" class=\"image-24\"  alt=\"email\" \/> <span class=\"head\">email this<\/span><\/a><\/li><\/ul><div class=\"clean\"><\/div> <\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p><strong>getting you through these last few weeks.<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2143,"featured_media":53762,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_relevanssi_hide_post":"","_relevanssi_hide_content":"","_relevanssi_pin_for_all":"","_relevanssi_pin_keywords":"","_relevanssi_unpin_keywords":"","_relevanssi_related_keywords":"","_relevanssi_related_include_ids":"","_relevanssi_related_exclude_ids":"","_relevanssi_related_no_append":"","_relevanssi_related_not_related":"","_relevanssi_related_posts":"","_relevanssi_noindex_reason":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[70,3002],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-58366","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor","category-special"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- this site is optimized with the yoast seo plugin v22.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>tax season funnies: how golf is like taxes - 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